


A Set Of Lies Agreed Upon

by prouvairablehulk



Series: sidere mens eadem mutato [3]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012), DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: I get nostalgic for my old neighborhood sometimes, Multi, gratuitous Newtown references
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-01
Updated: 2016-12-01
Packaged: 2018-09-03 14:30:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8717548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prouvairablehulk/pseuds/prouvairablehulk
Summary: “I agree,” says his sister, from where she’s sitting, sprawled over the laps of Sam and Mark, “but why aren’t we having this talk in a conference room?”





	

**Author's Note:**

> Another thing I realized I forgot to cross-post from Tumblr.

Len Snart steeples his fingers and glowers over them at the crew collected in front of him.

“This has gone on for too long. We need a plan.”

“I agree,” says his sister, from where she’s sitting, sprawled over the laps of Sam and Mark, “but why aren’t we having this talk in a conference room?”

Len rolls his eyes and lays his hands flat on the recycled wood table. The back space in the narrow Campos Coffee probably isn’t really big enough for them all, but like hell is he doing this is a place where Sara Lance might find them. Len Snart is matchmaking and Sara Lance will never let Len live this down.

“Okay, not to sound clueless or anything, but what exactly are we making a plan about?” asks Wally, as he sets drinks down in front of Jesse and Jax, before sliding a frappichino the length of the table to Len.

“Barry and Oliver.”

“Barry Allen? Nice guy marathon-running forensics department Barry Allen?” clarifies Wally.

“Yes.” says Len.

“And Oliver “the asshole of an Athletic Director who won’t let Len make an ice hockey team” Queen.“ says Jax, eyebrows creeping towards his hairline.

"Yes.” says Mick, from his seat to Len’s right.

“And the plan is to…” Shawna lets her voice trail off.

“Get them together.” says Len, firmly. “Allen’s been pining for far too long and it might help Queen get the stick out of his ass.”

This statement is followed by some under the breath mumbling that sounds like ‘and let me start the motherfucking ice hockey team for fucks sake’. Len and Oliver’s longstanding argument was the reason for the Snart-Rory family’s intense dislike of the athletics crew.

“Are we sure Allen’s pining?” asks Hartley. “I mean, from a purely aesthetic standpoint I get why he might be, but are we sure?”

He looks up from his coffee to the disapproving stares of the whole family.

“It’s Queen’s arms okay? Sue me.”

Shawna makes a little noise, like ‘fair enough’ and then Wally clears his throat.

“He’s pining.”

“And you know how?” asks Mark.

“He’s sort of my foster brother? He and Iris tell each other everything and don’t seem to care if I hear.”

“There we go!” says Len, as though this justifies everything. Mick grins.

“Wait, hold on, are you two adopting Barry Allen?” asks Sam. As the most recent adoptee, he’s predictably the most enthused about   
the idea of the inevitable Snart-Rory family growth. The others are used to it at this point. “Do we need to make him a jacket? Is he coming to the July 4th barbecue?”

“You have jackets?” asks Mick, pulling off an eyebrow raise he’s obviously picked up from Len. Everybody else is suddenly interested in anything but Mick, and Len laughs.

“We have a plan.” says Lisa, gesturing vaguely to include Mark and Sam.

***

This was the best plan.

To be fair, Jax was fond of any plan that involved him and his significant others getting to drink on Len’s dime and his psuedo-fathers getting to revel in their spectacular different kinds of hot. They were currently aggressively flirting with Barry Allen at the bar, and Jax’s sole job was to keep an eye on Oliver Queen.

“Look, I think we need to name the vein in his forehead.” says Jesse, frowning contemplatively over her Jack and coke. “It’s just so prominent in its throbbing.”

Wally attempts to stifle his laughter into the basket of hot chips in front of then and mostly fails. It’s about then that Iris West and Barry’s two other friends, Cisco and Caitlin, arrive at their table. Well, Iris arrives like a conquering queen. The others seem content to follow.

“What are you planning?” demands Iris.

“And by you, we obviously mean Captain Cold over there.” adds Cisco.

Wally looks at Jax. Jax looks at Jesse. Jesse looks at Wally. Wally’s eyes cut sideways to where Barry is excusing himself from Mick and Len and making his way back over to his friends. Jesse slaps at Jax’s arm excitedly as Oliver moves to intercept Barry and takes his arm to steer him outside. The minute the door closes the entire Snart-Rory family takes off to crowd around it and try to eavesdrop. 

The look of dawning comprehension on Iris’ face is perfection.

“I can’t believe you!” she says, but she’s smiling. Mark hushes her and turns back to Hartley, the only one who could hear anything through the door. Hartley raises a finger, and then beams, steps back, and pushes the door open. Framed like the cover of a romance novel are Barry and Oliver, curled tight around each other and still kissing.

From the bar, Mick wolf whistles.

Like a deer in headlights, Barry spins around, only to be greeted by Len’s smug smirk and applause from the collected crowd. He goes bright red, and glances down at his shoes while Oliver scowls.

“You’re welcome, Queen!” calls Mick, and the West siblings collapse into laughter.

Later that night, as they leave, Len clasps Barry’s shoulder in a firm grip.

“You should come for July 4th.”

Barry’s eyes widen, and Mick grins.

“Bring your boyfriend!” Mick calls as they leave. Oliver scowls again, and the whole table of their friends laughs.

(Most of the table ends up coming to the barbecue as well, anyway. Lisa’s shriek after Hartley sheepishly admitted he’d asked Cisco to be his plus one deserved historic status.)


End file.
